Author: Morgan Harper Nichols

it is okay
if it takes time
to find your place
in what keeps changing.
like the sky at the
edge of evening,
you have been learning
how to carry memory of
the sun’s fire through the dark,
while also allowing morning
to arrive on its own time.
it hasn’t been easy,
for so much as been shifting,
and yet, you have yet to disappear.
you’re still here,
slowly finding
rhythms in daylight,
gently remembering
how to live
fully again.

As you learn to let go, you are also free to imagine what you could be. Even here, in October, you are free to observe and notice what flowers still bloom alongside the changing, crumbling leaves. For after everything you have been through, and for all of the “letting go’s” and “goodbyes” that have taken shape, today, is still a brand new day.

And I know that today being a brand new day doesn’t change everything. It doesn’t make uncertainty go away or absence suddenly feel resolved. But perhaps, as sunlight filters through the leaves that remain steady on the trees and flowers appear on window sills and places you might not even expect, you are still free to imagine what continuity might mean: a way of staying with what is present, even as things keeps shifting. For perhaps, even here, you are free to consider: how change might hold more than one thing at once.

And if something in you seeks to welcome this kind of being present in any way, may you know it doesn’t have to be a grand gesture. Even a simple question is more than enough to soften into a space where imagination begins to feel less like an escape and more of an entry point into noticing what is already taking shape, even here, in the wild of October.

Perhaps, you might ask yourself…

What could begin now?
What might start again?
What has been here all along, just waiting to be seen?

Let this season be what it needs to be while also knowing, you are still free to dream. You are still free to notice what blooms, what endures, what returns, and what reminds you, you are free to cultivate a sense of aliveness, right here.

As fallen leaves and flowers can exist within the same landscape, “letting go” and “continuing on” can share the same space, too: what releases and what remains form a rhythm that both end up shaping you, and you discover what remains after letting go: A space to imagine what continues to take shape. – Morgan Harper Nichols

Words to repeat to yourself:
Even while learning from others,
I respect my unique process, too.
It matters to take time to cultivate
the kind of rhythms that make sense
for where I currently am.

The word “learning” tends to lend itself to movement: it can feel very external, active… a way of reaching out toward others, toward what is not yet known. This can be a beautiful thing: it opens connection, dialogue, and growth. Learning from others is so central to how ideas and skills circulate. And at the same time, there may be seasons where movement turns inward. You might start to reflect on all you’ve been taking in and wonder: “Am I actually understanding any of this?” “Or am I just trying to keep up?” In this space, even when we don’t use the word comparison, there might be a tendency to measure ourselves against others, questioning whether we’re moving fast enough or doing enough. But when we arrive here, it doesn’t mean we have to shut down or start over. Respecting your own process, in this sense, means noticing how learning actually unfolds for you, even when it doesn’t match the pace or pattern of others.

Over time, that awareness can turn into a kind of steadiness, where learning isn’t just about taking in more and more, and more about understanding what has already taken root. In this way: the word “learning” can also reflect return. After years and years of listening, trying, and revising, it can be a way of taking and shaping rhythms that make sense for where you currently are. To learn is to locate. To locate, even when the map changes. To keep listening, even after you’ve heard so much. And when learning takes that shape, it stops being about arrival at all, and becomes the ongoing practice of being where you are. – Morgan Harper Nichols

One way to think about gratitude is to think of it as if you were moving through a landscape, intentionally looking for the smallest, beautiful things worth noticing. You might notice flowers or blades of grass or dragonflies swarming about. As you move through the space, noticing those small things, you may eventually reach a point where those small things aren’t so small at all, and slowly but surely, they become a part of a bigger picture. This doesn’t mean that everything is perfect or easy in this landscape. However, by navigating in such a way that you were focusing on those small things, you start to notice that there was more to the picture than you may have initially realized.

When it comes to real life, we may not be able to create a comprehensive gratitude list for every single thing every day, but we can practice looking for small ways to acknowledge what we are grateful for and let it become a way of exploring where we are in a new way. This doesn’t mean we’re ignoring everything else, instead, it’s a way to go deeper where we are, how we can. – Here’s to gratitude, even in the smallest ways…a way of moving through experience…a way of noticing how the “good small things” might become not so small at all, on the journey, one day at a time. – Morgan Harper Nichols

Sometimes “strength” looks like taking a deep breath.
Sometimes “strength” is, “I am doing what I can right here, and that’s okay.”
Sometimes “strength” is asking for help when you need it.
Sometimes “strength” is a quiet moment of letting go.

Whatever form your strength takes, may you know that you are free to embody it in whatever way you know how.

This week, embrace your gentle strength by recognizing that you don’t have to do everything on your own. Even when it’s hard to make sense of anything beyond all of the responsibilities, this remains true: your strength is not measured by how much you can carry, but a reflection of a courage that shows in many places, including the quiet moments and small, gentle strength. – Morgan Harper Nichols

Here’s to practicing courage when it comes to being yourself. It’s not always easy, but it’s a journey that is always worth it.

Here are some questions to think about on this journey:

When do you feel most like the real you?
Who or what helps you feel most yourself?
When do you feel most genuine?
What activities or situations make you feel fully alive?

Even if it takes time to answer these questions, know that you are worthy of this journey. The journey of discovering where you feel just a little bit more free, regardless of what others think. Continue to reflect on where you feel free to be you. – Morgan Harper Nichols

There are new ideas up ahead of you.

There are new connections waiting to be made, even in the smallest ways.

And remember, it doesn’t always have to be that one big idea that makes a difference.

An idea is “a suggestion or plan for doing something.” It can also be “knowledge or understanding about something.”*

An idea might even sound like,

“What if I tried this?”

“Maybe this will work.”

“Here’s a thought.”

“It’s worth a try.”

“Here’s what I’ve been thinking…”

“Consider this…”

Not all ideas have to be big ideas to matter. Not all ideas have to be big ideas to reflect this beautiful truth: you are still learning and growing and making new connections right here. – Morgan Harper Nichols

Let this be the October you allow your heart to the possibility that you might be surprised in a good way. For all of the times in life where unexpected changes and shifts have found you, you are still free to consider: good change can still find you, too.

It might be slow coming, and you may still remember all the other times flickers of hope were futile, and quickly faded with shifting winds, but even then, the larger landscape you have been is still wide. Up above you, there is still an open sky and all around you, there is still a chance to be alive with an audacious belief: yesterday was not the end. 

As you move into October, release yourself from the pressure of perfection. Let yourself ease into each moment. You do not have to immediately begin counting down the days to the end of the year. Even though there is much to do, it still matters to find a steady rhythm here. Let yourself oscillate between effort and rest. And if that’s something you don’t feel like you know how to do yet, be kind to yourself as you practice it. 

Every time you think of “tomorrow” this October, remember to exhale however you can. Keep noticing the soil beneath you. Let yourself be grounded here, even before you know what’s ahead. 

Let this be the October you allow your heart to the possibility that you might be surprised in a good way. And no matter what changes or stays the same, may the groundedness, aliveness, and wholeheartedness be here to stay. – Morgan Harper Nichols

Today’s post is an excerpt from my Storyteller app. Thank you to all who support this work!

Remember the ways you have grown since last year. And remember: You don’t have to think of growth in linear, step-by-step ways. Like rings on a tree and flowing rivers, growth comes in many shapes. Like stars, your growth may be scattered, yet over time it forms a pattern worth recognizing.

Sometimes growth looks like having grown from one year to the next in age.
Sometimes growth looks like having been alive while flowers, trees, and blades of grass were growing, too.
Sometimes growth looks like realizing… you want to grow. You want to breathe deep and meet a new version of yourself.

Whatever “growth” looks like for you, no matter how big or small, and no matter if it feels like a set of stairs, tree rings, or a winding path, I just hope you know that even the most subtle ways you have grown are worth acknowledging, building upon, and being grateful for. – Morgan Harper Nichols

Whether you have felt that September has gone by quickly, slowly, or somewhere in between, what remains true is that there have been so many days you have made it through. May you never discredit how far you have come.

And remember this: remembering how far you have come doesn’t mean you’re ignoring the present moment; instead, it is an opportunity to move onward with gratitude. Gratitude for the progress you have been making, even in subtle ways, from one day to the next.

While taking a moment to pause might not fix everything, perhaps it can still become a reminder that amidst everything, you have still been on a journey…a journey where there is room to reflect, to heal, to learn, and to grow. All of the winding paths you’ve already made it through matter more than you know.

Take a moment to rest, however you can. You’re worth it.

Remember how far you’ve come.

Words to repeat to yourself today: “I am giving myself permission to add my own health and well-being to the list of things I care about.”

This one is for those moments where we may find ourselves overwhelmed and unsure of where we can create space for care, rest, gentleness…

It’s okay to start small.

Even in moments when it’s hard to prioritize ways to take care of yourself, any step you take still matters. Perhaps, even during the seasons of life when it’s difficult to remember all the things you need to do, you are still learning how to name your needs. Simply allowing yourself to start by saying, “I am worthy of care,” is a start. Be kind to yourself today, no matter what today’s to-do list looks like.

May today be a day when you find beauty in the smallest of things, softly enriching the corners of your mind for days to come. May each beautiful sunset connect you to even sweeter memories for the future. For every flower you notice, or each delicious snack you enjoy, let these small joys quietly affirm that you are alive. Though life’s journey isn’t always easy, such moments do accumulate, nurturing the hope that there’s more wonder ahead. And remember, it’s okay if it doesn’t feel like this all the time, all at once. Any smaller flicker of gratitude is still worth noticing, however you can. Paying attention to the small beautiful things doesn’t mean ignoring the big things, but instead, it’s an opportunity to be reminded of the small parts of the bigger picture that are worth nurturing and sharing, however you can.

Words to remember if you’ve ever found yourself comparing yourself to others:

The words we use when measuring ourselves against others can leave a lasting impression. We might sometimes catch ourselves uttering doubtful words like this…

Comparison Statements:

“I’m nowhere as good at this as they are, so why even try?”
“I’m missing something essential, and that’s why I can’t succeed.”
“I’m too late to have something good like this happen for me.”
“I’m not as good as they are, so I’ll never reach that level.”
“I’m falling short of the mark, and it feels like I’ll never catch up.”

But keep in mind, if these discouraging statements come to mind, other more uplifting phrases also exist. Here are some “inspiration expressions” to carry with you in times you find the kind of things that inspire you without the comparison.

No matter how small these moments over or how infrequent, let yourself hold on to them. Let them become seeds that you can water and watch grow.

Inspiration Expression:

“I’m so glad I found this. It sparks my creativity.”
“This is exciting. It makes me want to join in.”
“This is fun. I’m having a good time.”
“That was enlightening. It contributes to my understanding.”
“This is thoughtful. It makes me think differently.”
“That’s curious. It makes me want to know more.”

When it comes to this second list, may you know that there is no pressure if you don’t feel all of that at once, every day. But if you happen to notice even the smallest thing that you found enjoyable or interesting that didn’t make you feel the need to compare yourself to, let that be a moment of celebration. Keep noticing what is meaningful, engaging, and motivating, and let the more nourishing expressions continue to grow.

There are so many ways
things can take shape in your life,
but perhaps, for all that is unknown,
that doesn’t mean it can’t be beautiful.
Perhaps, even though the waiting
asks a lot of you, this is also true:
there will be new beginnings
and good things that are worthwhile, too.

I cannot tell you it will be easy,
and I cannot tell you it will come together
in a perfect way,
but I can tell you
there will be sunrises,
people worth knowing and loving,
and abundant encounters with boundless grace.

For all that has changed,
may there be room
for a new way forward
to emerge in an unexpected,
yet beautiful way.

-Morgan Harper Nichols

Something to remember: quiet space is not the absence of active engagement. Instead, a quiet space is an environment where you can practice what it means to simple be, even if only momentarily.

–

This week, look for room where you can say this, at least once:

“I am making space for quiet.”

What’s helpful about this phrase is that it is a reminder breathing room is a part of life, too. The metaphor of “making space for quiet” means creating a place, either in your mind or in your life, where there is room for calm and stillness, even if it’s just for a moment. This idea challenges the belief that all spaces should be filled with activity or sound.

Space doesn’t always need to be filled. There’s often a tendency to find large blocks of quiet, empty spaces (whether it’s our time or our surroundings) as space that need to be filled with something like work, noise, or distractions. Making space for quiet is a reminder that quite can be just as important as doing things. We may not always be able to create long periods of silence, but even just taking a moment to consider what we might desire for quiet space to look and feel like is a thoughtful way to begin create space, right here. Allow yourself room to think of quiet not as an absence of active engagement, but a nurturing space to simply be, from which you can return to the things you need to do with clarity. This is something you can practice. This is something you can adapt and modify.

Whatever this looks like for you, allow yourself to rethink quiet moments however possible. Even at the beginning of the week, even if it’s something you have to plan for later, it’s worth exploring. Even if it’s brief, small pauses are worth pursuing. Allow yourself to explore what making space for quiet could look like. – Morgan Harper Nichols

The ways you are learning to be present here are in vain. The ways you are learning to be gentle with yourself amidst the unknowns matters more than you realize. Even if you know you still have more ways to go and you’re keenly aware of areas in which you’d like to grow, the fact that you are here right now is a sign of courage all on its own. In a world that often prioritizes certain kinds of success and tangible, linear accomplishments, it may be hard to recognize just how much courage it takes to just move through the day. But it’s never too late to be the way who says, “I am trusting that my present matters. I trust that the ways I am learning how to move through this very space are not in vain.” – Morgan Harper Nichols

Give yourself permission to be proud of both the monumental and small ways you have learned to move on in this life. Breathe deeply, knowing that even if you can’t consciously recall every instance, that doesn’t mean growth hasn’t occurred. As the sun journeys across the sky each day, you, too, have been navigating through each phase of each day. Things haven’t been perfect, and plans often went awry, but even the smallest steps are meaningful. Every exhale is a form of letting go all on its own. I hope you can be proud of all the ways you’ve learned to move on…including the small ways.

You have more impact than you know,
in a million little ways:
In the way you make others feel welcome and accepted,
In the way you listen,
In the way you love,
In the way you remember details that others may not have noticed,
In the way you make someone laugh when they needed a laugh the most,
In the way you recognize the importance of rest,
In the way you send a text that might remind someone they haven’t been forgotten (even if they forget to respond!)…

You have more impact than you know
when you say “yes” or “no” when you need to,
when you are kind to yourself…

You have more impact than you know
in ways that are beyond words, but still matter,
and the list of possibilities goes on and on…

May you never overlook how powerful it can be to slow down for a moment and breathe. May you never forget how far you have already come in learning how to exhale and let go. It can be easy to only focus on the progress that you need to make, but may today be one of those days you remember: when it comes to finding peace, this is something you’ve been practicing, and with each deep breath you take, you are building on that practice.

Think of peace as a river, running wild through a forest. Even if there are times where you lose track of where you are, you are still free to pause and find your way back. Some days, it may take you longer than others, but you are not a failure if it takes time. Just know that each deep breath, each small moment you’re encountering peace matters and you are free to keep practicing each day, even in small ways.

Inhale.
Exhale.
Inhale.
Exhale.

-Morgan Harper Nichols